Howdy y'all! I've been called both hillbilly and crazy all my life so I reckon I've earned the title Crazy Hillbilly fair and square.
The purpose of this blog is really just to make you laugh and to try to make you think - Use that noggin!
Yeah, I try to do my part for the advancement of the Arts and Humanities. I provide people with stuff to read when they don't feel like doing anything productive. Now you can have some silly ideas floating around in your head when you finally stop being lazy and get back to working. Maybe you could even share some of them with your friends and co-workers for a laugh. Don't forget to tell them about HillbillyCrackpot.com
Hang around a bit and see what a crazy old hillbilly has to say about it. Below you will find the newest articles. For more browse the categories or use the search box at the top of this page.
One night, a mother told her own daughter to go buy some milk and she also told her to watch out for the railroad tracks. While the girl was crossing the railroad tracks, one of shoes got stuck and suddenly, she saw a train coming in the distance, she was still struggling to get her foot off the tracks, and the train was coming closer… and closer. Until, the train hit her, she lost both her legs but no one ever saw the poor little girl ever again.
Many years after that, there was another mother and told her own daughter to go and buy 3 bottles of milk. After that, when the girl came back, the mother was angry and said ‘You only bought 2 bottles of milk!’ And the mother decided that the little girl should be punished, and said that the girl should sleep outside for the night in the tent and said ‘and watch out for the click clack slide…’
So that night, while the girl was sleeping, something woke her up. She heard a noise from outside…click …..................... Read Complete Article...
Hillbilly recipe for biscuits and gravy from Mamaw Gerty!
Howdy to the folks on the innernet. My name is Merly Jean and I am gonna write some thangs that my Mamaw Gerty is a gettin reddy ta tell me.
Why thank ya Merly Jean, no dont write that. Well Ok leave it in then. Lawd that child! Now that I am a famous person on the innernet I figgered I wud tell yall bout a special recipe we got fer making the best delishusest biscits and gravy you ever seed. If n you like to eat atall yore gonna love my recipe. Now mind ya it haint nuthin faincy, just old fashuned good home cookin.
Most a yall probly gots one a them new fangled ovens whuts got that radio dial lookin thang that tells ya how hot it is in thar. My Henry took an bawt me one back in 19 and 78 and it was the ornriest thang ta get use to. But I like it jess fine now. When I start gittin reddy ta make my biscits and gravy I reach over …..................... Read Complete Article...
It all started when I was about three years old. My family and I moved into a big green house in Portsmouth Virginia. Once we moved in and got settled we started to hear footsteps coming from the front door going upstairs, and you could hear it walking around in the bedrooms.
The house was over ninety years old back in 1986 and we lived there for eleven years. My father said that the noises we were hearing was the house settling but in ninety years it should have settled a long time ago. The house was by a church that was haunted.
When I got older my mother told me the story about the church. The ghost in the church was that of a man who was murdered in there. He was the piano player and he was staying late to practice and somebody came in and chopped him up.
My friend and I were cleaning the church one night when we heard a noise coming from up stairs where they found him so we went to investigate. When we got to the top …..................... Read Complete Article...
When I was a kid growing up in Kentucky we all thought that hillbillies came from Georgia and Tennessee. We had no idea that we were hillbillies ourselves. Heck, we were just regular, ordinary people, well educated on the ways of the world and just as sophisticated as anyone else in the hollow.
I remember us sitting around watching the Beverly Hillbillies on TV. That was the first time I had ever seen these funny people. I asked my mother, “Are hillbillies really like that?” She told me they sure were and that she had actually talked to one of them when she went down to Lake Norris in Tennessee about 20 years ago. He talked real funny and she could barely understand what he was saying. “Is that where they live?” I asked her. That was how I found out that hillbillies were real people and they lived in Tennessee and Georgia mostly. …..................... Read Complete Article...
Howdy y’all my names Gerty and sum guy done told me that if I wood write sumthin fer his website then I cud get real famus and mebee wind up gittin rich one day. Lawd, it shore wood be right nice to be livin high on the hawg! Welp, since I warnt doin nothin anyhow but apart from fatnin up these here three possums me and my bruther done catched and baby sittin fer my 16 grand chilluns so I up and decided I wood write sumthin.
My furst problim was I never did larn to read nor write, but I have a grand youngin named Merly Jean that kin write so these here words are her a writin down what I’m a tellin her.
Well let me tell you what I was mad to my soul when I lissened to my young Merly Jean read what was on this here website. If y’all dont stop makin funna us hill folks I’m a gonna get my Merly Jean to hep me make my own website and tell everbody not to go to that hillbilly crackpot …..................... Read Complete Article...
Hillbillies have always recycled and been green!
Written by Granny Corder (A real live hillbilly woman!)
Although, “green” is the new in thing, hillbillies have always been green and done their part to eliminate waste from the local roadside dumps. Us hillbillies re-use everything we can until it can’t be used no more! And, then we still use it for something else. Us hillbillies are very creative!
1. When we eat corn on the cob, we’ve always used the cobs for all kinds of other useful things. We’ve made pipes out of them to smoke our homegrown tobacco. Used them for toilet paper in the outhouse and even stuck some twigs on them and made reindeers for Christmas decorations or toys!
2. When hillbillies strangle a chicken or a rooster to make that delicious Sunday chicken and dumpling dinner, we don’t allow no waste. Some hillbillies wouldn’t have even had a mattress or a pillow if it weren’t for chicken feathers! …..................... Read Complete Article...